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November 30, 2016

November was hard, but it also changed my life

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It’s the last day of November 2016 and what seemed like a hopeful time at the start of the month has become somewhat filled with uncertainty for so many. Who knew 30 days could pack such a punch?

However, this isn’t my first rodeo. There have been a lot of really tough times – which honestly have felt even tougher because they have been so much more personal in the past. I have allowed myself all the emotions that come as a result of these past few days (ahem, the election), but I also quickly was able to identify what I wanted my role to be and how I wanted to approach it all. For all its crappiness, November has brought some really positive changes too.

As a travel blogger, I embraced my responsibility to remind you about the power you have as consumers and fellow travelers in deciding where to spend your time and your money. You can read about it in detail here.

As a mother, I am further committed to my efforts in making sure my children are given the tools and knowledge to help them be better citizens of the world. If anything, a lot of what has happened not only nationally, but globally, in politics especially, has really emphasized the importance of education and travel. Though I still believe that one doesn’t have to travel far for a different experience and perspective, I do believe that we, as a people and as a country need to expose ourselves more to those things outside of our comfort, our knowledge, and our bubble and really make an effort to break past preconceived notions and generalizations of places and people.

I question myself almost daily on my homeschooling skills, but almost daily my boys will say or do something to give me the confidence in it all. For me, it’s all still very much day-to-day, but for my kids it’s a new way of life that they are enjoying tremendously.

Not traveling as much is a choice I have actively been working towards this past month. I have never really felt an urge to find myself, though it’s true that each new trip has led to a new discovery. I also have never felt that I was in search of something more. I love seeing the world and experiencing new cultures, but I also really love what I have found already and have felt that my time to nurture it and enjoy it was being limited due to my travel schedule.

It began to feel like I was a guest in my own home. I would arrive from a trip completely disconnected from the people I cherish the most. I hadn’t been able to foster any new friendships with neighbors, and I was missing out on things happening in my family’s lives. So I took control.

It's been nice to just be with them closer to home.

It’s been nice to just be with them closer to home.

In this past month I have met so many wonderful people, of all backgrounds and ages, that lived right by my house! I got together with Latina moms and spent almost an entire morning sipping on lattes and speaking Spanglish. The joy this moment brought my heart is immeasurable. On another rainy weekend morning I met with several moms of color, and we shared our experiences in raising our children, some of which are biracial, in a community where diversity is king, but inclusion sometimes falls short. It brought us all comfort to know we were not alone.

I was here for parties, and birthdays, and playdates, and coffee dates, and movie nights, and boy scout meetings, and doctors’ visits – including one to the ER for stitches, and community events. All of which I had missed too much of for so, so long.

My husband and I have gotten closer…and we got re-married!!

Elle King at The Beacon Theatre Elle King at The Beacon Theatre Elle King at The Beacon Theatre

November 22, 2016: Elle King performs at The Beacon Theatre in New York City.

November 22, 2016: Elle King performs at The Beacon Theatre in New York City.

I was finally able to sign my kids up for sports and arts and all the things I couldn’t before because I was never home enough to drive them to any of it.

In just one month there have been some incredibly potential opportunities put on the table that have sadly fallen through, and others that have been wonderfully lucrative and creatively fulfilling. I continue to find my strength as a negotiator for myself and my business, and have been rewarded in return, which has given me confidence moving into 2017. The blogging practices that I shared back in 2015 remain true today.

Over the next month, I am looking forward to sharing more travel stories as my family and I venture out and take on all that the holiday season has to offer. But I know that for many these times continue to be hard and frustrating, if not maddening and scary.

I get it. I felt so consumed by it for a bit there myself. But all those things changed me and I am feeling more myself than ever before. That was something that’s been hard to ignore.

So, I took a moment to focus on how to make lemonade out of all these lemons November brought forth…and damn. Is it delicious. Upward and onward, my friends. Life is just too damn short to waste.

 

 

 

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Carol Cain

Brooklyn native Carol is happiest when on an adventure, whether close to home or farther away. She is a small business owner and travel writer. In addition to creating Girl Gone Travel, she is the Founder and Principal of Brave World Media, a social media marketing, communications, and branding agency. She's mom to three wonderful sons and wife to a handsome Irish/Scot. She lives, works, and plays in the beautiful Finger Lakes region of NY.

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About me

Hi! I'm Carol! I am an award-winning travel blogger, a keynote speaker, and the Principal and owner of Brave World Media, a social media marketing, communications, and branding agency. I a wife to a handsome Irish/Scot and a mom to 3 sons. Welcome to my blog where I share stories of my travels and professional public relations insights and advice. Thank you for reading and for your support!

Carol Cain

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Follow @girlgonetravel

I get asked often if I miss the city, and the answ I get asked often if I miss the city, and the answer is all the time, but not really, but also yes, but kinda…depends. 

I think living in a slower paced environment has been good for me. Healthy and challenging in different ways. I sometimes get restless, but often need rest too. I love the space both environmently and in time to be creative. And I love that if I ever do get too restless, I am not far from Rochester (a city I’ve grown to love) or NYC. 

But I also love that when I feel any sense of anxiety, I can step outside, be surrounded by nature, and come back home a little more healed. Life is unpredictable, but during my era of slow living, I want to make sure to appreciate and enjoy all it offers.

#fingerlakes #newyork #slowliving #citygirlinthecountry
As we daydream of cozy winery settings sipping on As we daydream of cozy winery settings sipping on the best of harvest past, the work is already ongoing to prep for future success that elevates us among the best wine region in the country. So grateful for our community of immigrant laborers and farmers.
Twenty two years seems WILD. I still remember our Twenty two years seems WILD. I still remember our first date, and here we are a gazillion adventures and so many kids later, and over two decades together. 

I am the luckiest girl in the world to have met the most patient and kindest human around, and that he would end up being my person and best friend just feels, still, surreal and lucky. 

Happy anniversary, @travisjcain. I will try my hardest to make this year less chaotic and a bit more chill….but then again, you did decide to marry a Sagittarius, so it’s kind of on you. 🤣 Love you to infinity.
Happy winter and merry everything as we enjoy anot Happy winter and merry everything as we enjoy another snowy day in the Finger Lakes. 

Personally, I am ready to hibernate for a bit and enjoy a book or two by the fire while the sounds of my guys fills our home. 

I am in no rush to start the new year but am also excited to get started. I want a year filled with more time with friends, and pursuing projects that I am really inspired by and to be surrounded by inspiring people. I expect to say no a lot this year, after so many years of saying yes and regretting it. I want days that feel happy and healthy and fulfilling. 

Not too much to ask, right? And I wish you all a happy and healthy year too. May you love and be loved in all the ways you deserve and need. ❤️

Thanks for the follow, the support, the DMs and comments, and kindness expressed and shared.
This time of year is a joyous one but it can also This time of year is a joyous one but it can also be terribly overwhelming and draining. 

As someone managing two small businesses and all that life throws my way, I felt I needed a little escape, and Rochester always delivers!

We booked a hotel room, hit up all of our favorite spots, and a couple of new ones. On the list of musts:

📍Highland Park Diner- a must for a hearty breakfast to start the day. Best on weekdays for no crowds. 
📍Siren and the Sea - new cafe bookstore full of good reads, cozy vibes, and yummy drinks
📍Happy Earth Tea - where I picked up some delicious chai and matcha (also a sweet little yap spot with friends). 
📍Lamberton Conservatory - especially this time of year as it’s decorated for the holidays. Was a lovely spot to sit on a bench and zen out for a bit.
📍Winter Swan Coffee - afternoon cafecito, gift and plant shopping
📍Ugly Duck Coffee - the main reason we were inspired to come to Rochester on this specific day, for their Industry Night, where we nerded out about coffee “and beyond”. Of course we went back the next morning for coffee!
📍Rochester Public Market - for some evening holiday market strolling and hellos to our friends Sylvan Farm and Cidery who were working the market!
📍Lucky’s for dinner - yummy, but man oh man do I miss their onion rings!

Absolutely love this city for it’s ability to make me feel happier and lighter. Happy place 🫶🏾.
I’ve seen some pretty spectacular sunsets in my I’ve seen some pretty spectacular sunsets in my travels. Some of my absolute favorites have been on a beach in Mazatlán, Mexico, behind The Brandenburg Gate in Berlin, Germany, while sitting on a fisherman’s dock in Seoul, South Korea, along the rugged seashore of La Perla, Puerto Rico, and here in the Finger Lakes. Not an exaggeration. The sunsets here are stunning. Breathtaking even. 

#fingerlakes #newyork #citygirlinthecountry #sunsethour

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