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November 30, 2016

November was hard, but it also changed my life

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It’s the last day of November 2016 and what seemed like a hopeful time at the start of the month has become somewhat filled with uncertainty for so many. Who knew 30 days could pack such a punch?

However, this isn’t my first rodeo. There have been a lot of really tough times – which honestly have felt even tougher because they have been so much more personal in the past. I have allowed myself all the emotions that come as a result of these past few days (ahem, the election), but I also quickly was able to identify what I wanted my role to be and how I wanted to approach it all. For all its crappiness, November has brought some really positive changes too.

As a travel blogger, I embraced my responsibility to remind you about the power you have as consumers and fellow travelers in deciding where to spend your time and your money. You can read about it in detail here.

As a mother, I am further committed to my efforts in making sure my children are given the tools and knowledge to help them be better citizens of the world. If anything, a lot of what has happened not only nationally, but globally, in politics especially, has really emphasized the importance of education and travel. Though I still believe that one doesn’t have to travel far for a different experience and perspective, I do believe that we, as a people and as a country need to expose ourselves more to those things outside of our comfort, our knowledge, and our bubble and really make an effort to break past preconceived notions and generalizations of places and people.

I question myself almost daily on my homeschooling skills, but almost daily my boys will say or do something to give me the confidence in it all. For me, it’s all still very much day-to-day, but for my kids it’s a new way of life that they are enjoying tremendously.

Not traveling as much is a choice I have actively been working towards this past month. I have never really felt an urge to find myself, though it’s true that each new trip has led to a new discovery. I also have never felt that I was in search of something more. I love seeing the world and experiencing new cultures, but I also really love what I have found already and have felt that my time to nurture it and enjoy it was being limited due to my travel schedule.

It began to feel like I was a guest in my own home. I would arrive from a trip completely disconnected from the people I cherish the most. I hadn’t been able to foster any new friendships with neighbors, and I was missing out on things happening in my family’s lives. So I took control.

It's been nice to just be with them closer to home.

It’s been nice to just be with them closer to home.

In this past month I have met so many wonderful people, of all backgrounds and ages, that lived right by my house! I got together with Latina moms and spent almost an entire morning sipping on lattes and speaking Spanglish. The joy this moment brought my heart is immeasurable. On another rainy weekend morning I met with several moms of color, and we shared our experiences in raising our children, some of which are biracial, in a community where diversity is king, but inclusion sometimes falls short. It brought us all comfort to know we were not alone.

I was here for parties, and birthdays, and playdates, and coffee dates, and movie nights, and boy scout meetings, and doctors’ visits – including one to the ER for stitches, and community events. All of which I had missed too much of for so, so long.

My husband and I have gotten closer…and we got re-married!!

Elle King at The Beacon Theatre Elle King at The Beacon Theatre Elle King at The Beacon Theatre

November 22, 2016: Elle King performs at The Beacon Theatre in New York City.

November 22, 2016: Elle King performs at The Beacon Theatre in New York City.

I was finally able to sign my kids up for sports and arts and all the things I couldn’t before because I was never home enough to drive them to any of it.

In just one month there have been some incredibly potential opportunities put on the table that have sadly fallen through, and others that have been wonderfully lucrative and creatively fulfilling. I continue to find my strength as a negotiator for myself and my business, and have been rewarded in return, which has given me confidence moving into 2017. The blogging practices that I shared back in 2015 remain true today.

Over the next month, I am looking forward to sharing more travel stories as my family and I venture out and take on all that the holiday season has to offer. But I know that for many these times continue to be hard and frustrating, if not maddening and scary.

I get it. I felt so consumed by it for a bit there myself. But all those things changed me and I am feeling more myself than ever before. That was something that’s been hard to ignore.

So, I took a moment to focus on how to make lemonade out of all these lemons November brought forth…and damn. Is it delicious. Upward and onward, my friends. Life is just too damn short to waste.

 

 

 

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Carol Cain

Brooklyn native Carol is happiest when on an adventure, whether close to home or farther away. She is a small business owner and travel writer. In addition to creating Girl Gone Travel, she is the Founder and Principal of Brave World Media, a social media marketing, communications, and branding agency. She's mom to three wonderful sons and wife to a handsome Irish/Scot. She lives, works, and plays in the beautiful Finger Lakes region of NY.

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About me

Hi! I'm Carol! I am an award-winning travel blogger, a keynote speaker, and the Principal and owner of Brave World Media, a social media marketing, communications, and branding agency. I a wife to a handsome Irish/Scot and a mom to 3 sons and 2 puppies. Welcome to my blog where I share stories of my travels and professional public relations insights and advice. Thank you for reading and for your support!

Carol Cain

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I’ve been a mom for a really, really long time. I’ve been a mom for a really, really long time. As the oldest of all my many, many siblings, caring for littles started very early in my life. I have cared for, changed diapers for, fed, rocked to sleep, booboo-kissed, advised, reprimanded, worried for, been frustrated and given anxiety by more kids than I care to count. Because I started caring for children so young, I was convinced I wouldn’t have any of my own. But I had my three beautiful boys.

I miss the little babies they were, sometimes to the point where it aches, but I love seeing the men they are becoming. I am most grateful to them for the ways in which they continue to help me discover more about myself both as a mom and beyond motherhood. My identity was never fully in being a mom, I never wanted that for myself and they all have respected, accepted, and given me space for that. And I love them unconditionally for it. Because as they start to find their own paths in life, I am not left with an empty anything, instead I find myself with a life fulfilled. Of which being their mom has been the greatest adventure.

Happy Mother’s Day to all the amazing mother figures, caregivers, and humans who have provided for another in loving, maternal ways regardless of biology and traditional roles and societal expectations. ♥️ May you find fulfillment, love, and joy in the ways you have tried to give to others who needed it most.
The Village of Monticello is located right off NYS The Village of Monticello is located right off NYS Route 17 (future I-86), mid-way between New York City and Binghamton. It is also the largest community of the Sullivan County Catskills. Like many rural downtowns across the U.S., Monticello has experienced some hardships. However, what I found especially lovely was how there is a vibrant BIPOC community, especially Latino, thriving with their small businesses and eateries keeping Downtown Monticello alive.

Imagine my delight to have seen several Dominican- Puerto Rican eateries serving and sounding like a slice of home. Last night’s treat was had at @nellys_latin_restaurant. 

Roasted pernil, grilled chicken, rice and peas, yuca, sweet plantains, ox tail, goat….the list goes on and on. Right here in Monticello, NY. I ate and washed it all down with a cool papaya shake, just like from the islands.

So, if driving through, be sure to check out downtown Monticello for some good Caribbean eats…and wait till I tell you about breakfast!!! Thanks @nickfingdavis for the find! 🇩🇴🇵🇷

#monticellony #catskills #goodeats @sullivancatskills
Nothing like the beautiful golden hour in @flxwine Nothing like the beautiful golden hour in @flxwinecountry.🌞

#myflx
These days you will find me walking in the rain, c These days you will find me walking in the rain, chasing waterfalls, and anything nature filled. Such is spring in the Finger Lakes 🌷

#fingerlakes #lifeinthefingerlakes #cascadillagorge #ithacany
I sometimes can’t believe how easily I fell in l I sometimes can’t believe how easily I fell in love with this life.

There was a time when my DREAM was to be one of those old NYC ladies living in a 4 story walk-up, and who people would often see pulling around her shopping cart from market to market. And while I long for a NYC that barely exists anymore, I do have to say I am still often surprised at how dramatically that dream has changed.

Now I dream of uninterrupted days spent tending to my garden and growing food and other pretty greenery I never knew I could. Or figuring out new recipes and sitting by the fire with my puppies on my lap.

I crave mornings made foggy by the adjacent lake, and early wake-ups by the sound of the passing horse and buggy on Sunday mornings.

Yeah. The world is big and there is so much I want to see still but I also love this place where it feels like nothing else matters, not even the mud on my hands and boots.

📸 Gardening bliss on a rainy day at @theflxcottage.
Yesterday, we headed to @tanglewood_nature_center Yesterday, we headed to @tanglewood_nature_center to scout a photography location. The focus was work. But as we took the 3 mile hike to the overlook, through the mud, in the rain…and the sun, because spring, and as the birds sung, the woodpeckers pecked, and the deer strutted, I felt myself feel lighter, happier, and at ease. With just a walk, in this beautiful place. Alongside my beautiful partner.

If you call the Finger Lakes home, I hope you can also appreciate it and the gifts it offers, even when we least expect it. And if you need a reminder, just go outside.

#tanglewoodnaturecenter #fingerlakes

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